Bette: Queen Of The Palace
by The Divine Miss Tiffany


Photo: BaltoBoy Steve Weiner

Bette was in great form at the Palace of Auburn Hills on Friday night. It was a five hour drive for me from Indiana, but it was worth every minute. I’m so glad she’s not retiring and we can’t make her! She opened the show by saying how glad she was to be in a “blue state.” How true, how true!

After “Kiss My Brass” and “Big Noise from Winnetka,” Bette said she was tired and needed to catch her breath. “That’s what happens when you sing your own songs” she commented (the audience went crazy). “Which reminds me,” she continued, “I must remember to call Ashlee . . . give her some tips!”

A lot of the show was the same as her January performance at the Palace, with updated jokes and a few song changes. I’m not from Detroit, so I didn’t get all of the local jokes. She did mention Big Beaver Road, which was at exit 69. It makes me wonder what she would come up with if she ever came to Indianapolis. We have an Interstate 69!

Some of the songs added on this leg of the tour were “Hey There,” “The Britney Bunch,” “Phantom of the Opera” during Delores, and, as an encore, “In the Cool, Cool, Cool of the Evening.” Bette didn’t sing “Keep On Rockin’” or “September.”

Bette did a couple of Soph jokes that I hadn’t heard before (or, at least, I don’t remember them), along with a my new favorite, “They gave me a *@!*# Chihuahua!” Conspicuously absent (to me, anyway) was “Ain’t you got a vase?”

There was a bit of rambling, which is one of the things I love about Bette. She takes the moment and goes with it. When her earpiece came out, she paused and explained what it was and why she didn’t try to hide it. She asked the audience to sing “The Rose” to her, and then stopped us after the first 2 phrases and made us start againb because it wasn’t very good. Bette said that was okay though, because we hadn’t been singing it for 25 years like she had. She mentioned a gentleman in the front row who had his arms crossed pretty much the whole evening and them imitated him. She accepted gifts of flowers from the audience and acknowledge a group of fans in the front row.

This was my 4th Bette concert (2 of Divine Miss Millennium and 2 of Kiss My Brass) and this was my favorite. Bette seemed to be truly enjoying herself and the performances were flawless. The audience was pretty good too. After her encore, Bette commented, “I don’t have anything else to sing!” and sounded a bit surprised that everyone wanted her to keep going.

The best part of the evening was that I was able to share it with two of my best friends who had never seen Bette in concert before. I think originally they agreed to come just to humor me, but after the show, one said, “I get it now. That was incredible.”

Now, my only question is, Bette, when are you going to come to Indianapolis? I’m ready to see the show again!

"Detroit, I'm back!"
by Zack


Photo: BaltoBoy Steve Weiner

"Detroit, I'm back!" Bette Midler lamented at the beginning of her 2 1/2 hour "Kiss My Brass" spectacle at the Palace Friday night. "Only in Detroit is there a Big Beaver Road and it's exit 69 on the freeway! Who was your town planner? Larry Flynt?"

After flying in on a horse singing "Kiss My Brass," Midler had the audience in the palm of her hand. "These are the Lipitor years" Midler quipped as she pranced around the stage.

This was not a concert for the faint of heart or the Republican. "It's great to be in a blue state this evening, Michigan!" No one was free from Bette's insults. Britney, Ashlee, Christina, Dick Cheney, Rush Limbaugh, the list goes on.

Midler performed all of the hits including "Wind Beneath My Wings," "Friends," "From A Distance," "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy," and the list goes on and on. As the night wore on, Midler just kept getting better and better as familiar favorties Soph, based on the late comedian Sophie Tucker, and Delores Delago, the mermaid with big dreams who, this time around, finally made it to the big room!

Midler ended the show on an emotional note with "The Rose" and thanked us because as she said "She always has a great time in Detroit." I am holding her to her promise of "I'm not retiring and you can't make me!" Because she is the last of the true entertainers.

"Kiss My Brass" is your best Bette!