Lorin
A Bona Fide BetteHead

Photo: BaltoBoy Steve

Philadelphia definately made up for in what it lacked during the Divine's Millenium tour. I was there for both and the audience tonight was just unbelievable. Laughing, standing, yelling. It was truley a geniune Philly welcome. Maybe it's because the locals are thrilled with a winning football team.....nah it's definately the Divine on her own.

She started with the regular genre, mentioned the mummers and did a sad imitation of the mummers strut. But I do recall a quote of The Mummers, a bunch of men, in
outrageous outfits, is that my kind of scene or what!!!" She did of course mention the Eagles, how could she not.

She changed a few items around no more "C'mon a my House," instead one of my absolute favs (don't get me wrong I love "C'mon a my House,") is "HeyThere," it was great! She stopped seconds into the song and asked "am I in the right key? I told you this was new tonight, even singers fuck up."

It was another astonishing performance, you could tell she was actually having a fantastic time. You know when she laughs at herself and throws herself onto the floor. She talked to the audience, she even did a few autographs but not before saying I'm not signing that you're just going to put it on ebay. Finally she gave in, then she said I know that I'm going to see it on ebay. She also autographed a program, and someone gave her what looked like a homemade lei, it was all great gestures.

She really was a different person since the millenium tour when she said Philly was her worst show performance and audience wise. But they more than made up for this year. I got chills from the reaction of the audience.

The DivineMiss P
The Traveling BetteHead

First of all, my actual seat was on the floor, but like 30 rows away, and I'm short, so that sucks. So, I went to the box office and, after some begging for an upgrade, they gave me a seat in the second row! I made "friends" with all the people sitting around me- everyone seems so nice in Philly! I could tell these were all real Bette fans(well, not compared to people like us), but ya know sometimes you hear people talking before the concert and they have like no clue who Bette even is. Not the case in Philly.

There was an amazing spirit and standing ovations for practically every song- seriously! I cannot tell you the local jokes, though, because I'm from Northern New Jersey(half hour from NYC) and didn't understand any of them. You'll have to rely on some of your other sources for that info.

No Mary Tyler Moore story tonight before "Skylark", which was too bad cause I thought that was hysterical. Everything was pretty much the same as the other shows until the Rosemary Clooney segment. Before they brought down the screens with Clooney pics, Bette sang "Hey There" on a bare stage. She told everyone that it was the "world premiere" of her singing it live. She started a cappella (you know, "lately when I'm in my room...) and then stopped because she was in the wrong key. So funny! She asked Bette Sussman for her note and said that she was completely off. Then she said something to the effect of, "even stars screw up", or something. The audience just ate it up. During the part where she's talking to herself in the song, the Harlettes were up in the little tower/castle windows stageright(it's the audience's left) and they sang "hey there, you with you head in the clouds.." and she answered, "you talking to me"- just like on the recording.

There were some added parts to the Viagra/mycocksafloppin joke, but I really can't remember them. Sorry! It was just some other generic names for Viagra- I think one of them was my-dicks-a-pokin', but I could be wrong.

Anyway, some guy in the second row, far right threw a bouquet of yellow roses up on stage at some point. She didn't notice when they were thrown, but came across them on the floor and picked them up and put them on the piano. She said thank you and then, in a loving way, made fun of the flowers because they really were a mess. She said, "I'm sure these flowers made a long trip here". It was really funny.

She brought down the house, as usual with "When a Man Loves a Woman". It was incredible. Then there was a new(new to me at least) Soph joke. She and Ernie have there annual physicals together and the doctor tells Soph that Ernie complains he is always sweating hot the first time they have sex and then freezing cold during the second time. And Soph says, ' that's because the first time is in July and the second time is in December!' Have you ever heard that one before???

During intermission I am plotting about how I'm going to get this lei to her. The problem is, I am smack in the middle of the second row. I couldn't possibly make like 30 people get up so that I could get out and get up to the stage. So, I made nice with these two security guards. I tell them my saga and ask them what I should do. They tell me that I'm not allowed to approach the stage, and I beg and plead and bat my eyelashes to no avail. Then their "supervisor", or whoever, comes over and I flirt shamelessly with him(which he returns). He says, "oh yeah, you're gonna get your friend to take a picture of you while you're up there, right". And of course, there is no friend and no camera because I'm there by myself!!! He doesn't believe me and tells me to prove it. We go over to my section and everyone swears that they're not with me, don't know me, etc. It was funny.....in retrospect. Anyway, he tells me he'll go backstage and ask her promoter. If he says yes, then he'll come back and let me know. Second act starts and there's no word from this dude, and I am frightened by how easily I now will use my skills of flirtation to try to get closer to Bette!

There were a ton of standing ovations for Delores. When she came back out to do Mister Rodgers, there was a poi ball still on the stage. She picked it up and said, "Who wants a ball?" and threw it in my direction, but the people in front of me got it. She sang "I Like To Be Told" and then added in some new bits about what she would "like to be told". I haven't seen the show since Nassau Coliseum, so she may have made these remarks before, but it was my first time hearing them. She said she wanted to be told where Osama bin Laden is, or at least that we're looking for him(which I have been saying forever too). She talked about the media and what a blurred picture is being painted for us by them and shoved in our faces. She did a bit of Bush-bashing and the audience totally supported her. She said to keep it quiet though- she doesn't want the same thing that happened to the Dixie Chicks to happen to her! Joking aside, I agree with her political views, and apparently a lot of Philadephia does too.

She sang "September" and then "From A Distance", and said before singing the latter, "if wishes were horses..." about the vision of peace described in the song. Then was the best "Do You Want To Dance" I've ever seen. She encouraged all us on the floor to get up and all the couples were dancing. It was soooo romantic- well not for me, as I was alone, but I'm okay, don't worry...

Before "Wind Beneath My Wings", she dedicated it to some guy in the audience named Ren(Wren?) who apparently was at Hulaween and brought TEN people with him to it. She thanked him for his generous donations and sang a little ditty about doing benefits to the tune of "People". It was HILARIOUS! I guess it was about this point when people in the front row started giving her stuff- a stuffed animal and several people with shirts/pictures for her to sign. Frankly, I think it's totally cheesy to ask her autograph stuff during a show. After is fine, but to make her sit and sign stuff while she has a stadium of people watching. Whatever...

She seemed reluctant, actually, saying "I know you're just gonna sell this stuff on Ebay", but signed a few anyway. Everyone in my section was telling me to just go and give her the lei, since nobody else was getting in trouble. And so.....I DID!!!

It was so incredible- she gave me SUCH a grin and a look of surprise. I guess she was surprised that someone thought to do that. It was priceless. And then she wore it the whole time she sang "The Rose" and I sobbed like a crazy woman. Of course, I have no picture, so if ANYONE took a picture like you weren't supposed to, I would give ANYTHING to have it!!! If not, I will always rememeber it just as it was- perfect!

Jamie - the Divine Mrs. M

Yes indeedee-dooo!! We made up for the last "bomb" 4 years ago. The show was (as usual) amazing. Bette did seem a little rushed/nervous early on. Probably having flashbacks of the dead crowd she played to the last time.

However, this crowd was different!! We had great seats (floor row 8) and WE laughed and cheered like a Philly crowd SHOULD and by the Soph jokes, Bette had shifted into high gear and had a blast with us!! Making jokes about the cold and how she was freezing her ass off...telling us "it's so cold my nipples are erect" as she ran to the center of the stage - what a riot!!!

New to the show was Hey There - god she sounded great! Even though she was in the wrong key at first ;-) She had to play to the Philly crowd and brought up those god damn Eagles - UGH ..I HATE that team!! Although she said.."So, you're gonna win the Super Bowl, huh?? Well It's ABOUT TIME!! How long has it been since ya won
something??" I enjoyed that comment.

Anyway, when I was at the NYE show, 3 songs were cut out for the New Years celebration and I didn't "get" the Mr. Rogers part of the show. But, I get it now...she talks about how safe the world was and the state of our world now and leads into September, From A Distance & then my all time Fav...Do You Want To Dance...Incredible!

I read a recent interview where Bette says she likes the "stillness of an audience when I sing a ballad". Try this the next time you see her...when she is singing September, take a look around you a the faces in the audience. Bette reaches out to everyone and there is a silence over everyone. They're just caught up in the moment and the message of the song.

Any-hoots...the show was great, we laughed, we cried but most of all we cheered and I think Bette really felt it!!!!

Now, just 3 day until the next one...NYC here we come (again).

Big, bawdy show from Bette Midler
By A.D. Amorosi
For The Inquirer

Bette Midler likes 'em big.

The alternately bawdy and sentimental queen of the triple-entendre, who has built her tour reputation on large-scale extravaganzas, brought her "Kiss My Brass" show to the sold-out Wachovia Center on Thursday. And she didn't travel light this time either.

Miss Don't-Say-Cher ("I'm not retiring, and you can't make me!") packed everything: sky-soaring carousel horses, intricately lit flower girls, wheelchair-winging mermaids, a horn-heavy band, costumed Harlettes choreographed by Toni Basil, and a backdrop that looked like Circus Circus meets the Tower of London.

The props were never a distraction: Midler welcomed the flying horse she rode out on and sang "Shiver Me Timbers" with the same romantic glee. And her fish-themed medley with the Harlettes was pure Little Mermaid Does Broadway: derbies and Fosse hands for Chicago, popping marquee lights for Gypsy, a grand staircase for Hello, Dolly!

Midler's vocal range also was plus-size: Jumping from soprano lilt to Merman blasts, the singer - who is anything but plus-size these days - invigorated chestnuts such as "When a Man Loves a Woman" and branded the big-band "Stuff Like That There" with equal doses of schmaltz and halting reserve. Her humor was as broad as it was catty. She made dumb jokes about Viagra; Saddam Hussein dressed by Queer Eye for the Dictator Guy; and Rush Limbaugh, who castigated Eagles QB Donovan McNabb, then was investigated for illegal use of Oxycontin, which makes him an "oxymoron." Ba-dum-bum.

The pleasures of excess notwithstanding, Midler's voice was best when things were at their smallest. The evening's nicest moment was the nearly a cappella "I Like to Be Told," a strangely earnest duet with an on-screen Mister Rogers. Other high points were her sassy, elegant tribute to Rosemary Clooney on "Hey There" and "Tenderly"; the whispery drama of "I Think It's Going to Rain Today"; and the heavenly soul of "That's How Heartaches Are Made," which found her soaring gracefully through rolling congas and delirious background vocals.