Tag Archives: Practical Magic

Tuesday, June 12, 2018

21 Witchy Movies to Keep You Spellbound Until ‘Suspiria’

 

Demario Marks 21 Witchy Movies to Keep You Spellbound Until ‘Suspiria’ By Demario Marks Posted on June 7, 2018

  Bette Midler, SJP, and Kathy Najimy, Hocus Pocus If you’re a horror fan (or a Luca Guadagnino or Tilda Swinton fan), chances are you’ve already seen the new Suspiria trailer a few times. The fresh take on an Italian classic doesn’t hit theaters until November, but it’s already garnered plenty of early buzz (early footage at a CinemaCon luncheon led to nauseous praise) and scrutiny (the color palette features less Argento neon and more shades of gray) from horror aficionados and reboot detractors. Regardless of whether it recalls the original or is a complete diversion, the Suspiria redux will join the ranks of one of the greatest subgenres of storytelling: witch movies. Whether they’re funny or horrifying, heartwarming or tragic, stories about magic-practicing women have been a cultural mainstay long before the advent of film. In both Macbeth and Greek mythology, three powerful ladies foresee and shape the future using sorcery. These trinities of influential, mysterious women still crop up in pop culture today, along with references to historical superstitions like those that were at play in Salem and medieval Europe. Most witches on screen are clearly figments of popular imagination–they seem to practice an unlikely mash-up of Wicca, ceremonial magick, and Hollywood-ified Satanism–but the ideas they stand for and the themes their stories address are real and powerful. Sisterhood, womanhood, female friendship, queer love, and matriarchal power are boldly displayed (with either pride or fear depending on the movie) in these stories, making witches an ideal vessel for radical storytelling. Fictional witches, like most supernatural beings, have long since been a stand-in for “the other,” and their stories have become the stories of the marginalized. Women, people of color (although it should be noted that popular witch movies are still overwhelmingly white), the LGBT community, and more have all found a voice in these portrayals of ostracized people with unrecognized talent who are able to claim their power for better or worse. When (if?) you finally tire of watching the Suspiria trailer, give one of these witchy flicks a try: SUSPIRIA (1977) The original Suspiria is often celebrated as one of the best horror movies of all time for a reason. Dario Argento’s gripping, Giallo-influenced film is a nightmare drenched in vivid colors and shot with gorgeous precision. For the uninitiated, the movie follows a wide-eyed American ballet dancer as she uncovers a series of murders at a German dance studio. Lush, mysterious, and picture-perfect, it’s no wonder this one’s hailed as a masterpiece. THE WITCHES (1990) This movie didn’t quite connect with audiences when it was released, which is a shame because a Jim Henson-produced adaptation of a Roald Dahl classic (starring Anjelica Huston, no less) is just the type of off-the-wall ‘90s filmmaking that we’re all missing right about now. The practical effects of this movie, which is about a boy who’s turned into a mouse by kid-hating witches, are a little dated and strange, but it’s all in good fun. Dahl’s humor still shines through, and the movie would make a mean double feature with another Jim Henson production like The Dark Crystal or Labyrinth. THE LOVE WITCH (2016) If there’s such a thing as an instant cult classic, Anna Biller’s candy-colored homage to ‘60s movies is it. The Love Witch is a feminist take on gender and relationships told through the lens of a stylish Californian witch (Biller) named Elaine who can’t seem to stop murdering her lovers. It’s billed as a horror comedy, but it’s light on horror and heavy on comedy. Biller is a revelation as Elaine, a resourceful, confident neo-femme fatale with wonderfully arch delivery. HÄXAN (1922) This Swedish silent film is essentially an early documentary, although its dramatic reenactment sequences court horror and initiated some genre habits that are still alive today. The film is surprisingly progressive, revisiting periods of historical witch-hunts within the context of superstitions and limited medical understanding. Häxan’s greatest strength is its gorgeous design: detailed masks, costumes, and sets make the things that go bump in the night come alive in memorable, impressive ways. ROSEMARY’S BABY (1968) A masterwork of paranoia and suspense, Polanski’s classic is every bit as essential today as the day it came out. Mia Farrow absolutely owns the screen as a mom-to-be suffering through a pregnancy from hell, who suspects she’s being manipulated by the people around her, including her husband, upstairs neighbors, and doctor. In this saga of forced female helplessness, gaslighting has never been scarier, and when the finale comes around–even if you’ve seen it a dozen times before–it hits hard and stays with you. I AM NOT A WITCH (2018) Rungano Nyoni’s feature debut is still on the festival circuit in many places, but if it comes to a theater near you, don’t miss it. The satire blends fact with fiction in its imagined version of Zambia, where a young girl is banished to a witches camp after being the only witness to a village accident. The girl’s witch-hood remains to be seen, but her experiences in the camp (where women are tied to long white ribbons so they don’t fly off) are mesmerizing thanks to Nyoni’s poetic direction and ability to shift nimbly between lighter and darker tones. SCOOBY-DOO ON ZOMBIE ISLAND (1998) As a Scooby-Doo aficionado, I feel confident in my claim that Zombie Island is the best of the franchises’ animated movies. Despite the title, Mystery Inc.’s culprits in this Louisiana-set adventure are actually a trio of Southern cat witch shapeshifters. You read that correctly: this is the first Scooby-Doo outing where the bad guys turn out to be real supernatural beings rather than old-man-so-and-so. The whole story has an especially dark tone, reinventing some of the gang’s mythology while also building up the central mystery in inventive ways. Plus, these three witches–Civil War-era, voodoo-practicing Southern belles–are iconic among the Cartoon Network-loving crowd. THE WITCH (2016) If there’s been a more commanding, stylistically assured debut than Robert Eggers’ Puritan-era thriller in recent memory, I must have missed it. A folktale about the subtle but sure threat of womanhood in the face of religious superstition, The Witch is a feast for the senses despite its brittle and increasingly lifeless setting. Dangerously wide open shots draw viewers’ eyes to the screen’s corner, then away as we anticipate the appearance of some disturbing specter, all while an oppressively spooky score works overtime to quicken the pulse. Anya Taylor-Joy is riveting as Thomasin, a teen girl who comes under suspicion from her banished family after losing her infant brother to an unseen kidnapper. HOCUS POCUS (1993) A fixture on the Disney channel and on ABC Family’s (now Freeform) 13 Nights of Halloween, this initially poorly received horror comedy is now a Halloween must-watch for a certain generation of viewers. Set in Salem, the cult favorite tells the story of three witches (Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Kathy Najimy, all nearly unrecognizable in wigs and varying levels of hag makeup) who wreak joyful havoc after being accidentally summoned by a mopey boy virgin. This one admittedly has little appeal to those who didn’t grow up with it, but in the past 25 years, it’s gained enough popularity to warrant talk of a potential sequel. DRAG ME TO HELL (2009) Witches don’t get more stereotypical than the hag at the center of Sam Raimi’s epic gross-out. With origins that appear vaguely Romani and the same moniker as a Greek she-demon, Ganush (later called Lamia in demon form) is a poor-woman-turned-vengeful-spirit who just won’t leave this darned bank loan official alone. Marking Raimi’s much-anticipated return to horror post-Spiderman, Drag Me to Hell is an orchestra of gore and disgust composed mostly of bugs and rot and blood and fluid. Though her character is not fleshed out beyond the basics, the witch in question is certainly one of the most formidable characters on this list. TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE: THE MOVIE (1990) The TV series version of Tales From the Darkside is the perfect ‘80s comfort food entertainment–over-the-top and poorly aged, but binge-able and original nonetheless. In the spirit of other contemporary anthologies like Creepshow, the movie version is a mostly great series of shorts connected by a frame tale. In this case, the connecting thread is that each of these stories is being told by a young boy who’s stalling after being captured by a cannibalistic witch disguised as a preppy housewife-type. The stories themselves are doozies too, with a short Stephen King adaptation and a Steve Buscemi and Christian Slater-led outing among them. HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS PT. 2 (2011) Anyone can tell you that witches play a huge part in J.K. Rowling’s omnipresent books, but some of the movie adaptations certainly contain more girl power than others. Although the final film isn’t the series’ best, it includes undeniable moments of badass witching from the likes of Professor McGonagall, Mrs. Weasley, Hermione, and several other clever magical ladies. KIKI’S DELIVERY SERVICE (1989) Kiki A sweet, low-stakes Miyasaki favorite, Kiki’s Delivery Service reimagines witches as cute and child-friendly. Titular hero Kiki rides a broom and has a familiar in the form of a black cat, but that’s about where her similarities to traditional witches of lore end. In this story, Kiki gets a job at a flight-based delivery service specially designed for witch couriers and struggles to get the hang of her newfound responsibilities. The movie contains gentle lessons about follow-through, friendship, and self-care, all while upholding Miyasaki’s trademark sense of wonder and magic. PRACTICAL MAGIC (1998) Would it be overkill to call this Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman-starring romantic drama a magical version of Thelma & Louise? Probably, but between the accidental murder of an abuser, deep, naturalistic female bond (this time between sisters), and heartland-courting soundtrack, the comparison isn’t far off. The film, about three generations of magical sisters dealing with the repercussions of a love-related family curse (and either embracing or rejecting their powers in the process), is the kind of lighthearted yet emotionally involving fare that’s perfect for a popcorn movie night with friends. Thanks to a memorable climax, it’s also one of the most slyly feminist and empowering witch movies to date.

THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT (1999) ...  Read More

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Wednesday, October 15, 2014

10 things I learned from ‘Hocus Pocus’

Hello Giggles 10/12/2014 07:10 AM2 OLD LADY MOVIE NIGHT 10 things I learned from ‘Hocus Pocus‘ Anne T. Donahue hocus-pocus1 Here’s a fact that will surprise absolutely nobody: I wasn’t allowed to see Hocus Pocus when it came out in theatres because I was eight, and . . . I actually think that’s the only reason why. NOW, I will admit that my parents may just not have wanted to take me to see Hocus Pocus because they didn’t want to see Hocus Pocus (because honestly: how scary was this movie, really?), but still. Rules were rules and I didn’t see it until many years later when it was old hat to everybody else. Life is unfair is what I’m saying. And do you know who understands that sentiment more than anybody on this planet? Witches. And not just any witches: the witches of Hocus Pocus who include but are not limited to the Sanderson Sisters. (And I am Bette Midler, always.) Truly, it was between this and The Crucible (another movie I wasn’t allowed to see), but I figured, hey: the time to hesitate is through. We need to talk about Hocus Pocus. TRY AND STOP ME NOW MOM AND DAD. Here’s what I learned about it so far: 1. Ultimately our parents maybe had a point: this movie is terrifying When you think about it, the idea of three women stealing children to absorb their youth is INSANE. That is TERRIFYING. And even though I know I would’ve watched this, stoked to be watching Bette Midler on the big screen (loved her since The Simpsons thank you very much), a smaller — albeit super consuming —part of me would’ve thought, “Tonight it will happen: I will be taken by these women, and then I will die.” Kind of like watching Unsolved Mysteries as a kid where you’d be too scared to walk by your bathroom, convinced some dude would appear to the theme song. Or was that just me? Should I even be watching Hocus Pocus NOW? (Yes.) 2. Seriously though, our society bred the Sanderson sisters And I say that because we as a society are freakishly youth-centric, so clearly they were made to feel like they SHOULD steal youthfulness — ala Fiona in American Horror Story: Coven — because our world is gross. Yes, even in the 1600s. THIS FLAWED IDEOLOGY TOOK CENTURIES TO BREED, PEOPLE. 3. I am Thora Birch, always Or more specifically: we should aspire to be Thora Birch. She’s sassy — referred to as “bratty” in this movie, but that’s blasphemous — and she’s brazen and she does not put up with anybody’s nonsense. Frankly, she speaks her mind better as a child in 1993 than I have done as a 20-something-year-old woman. Why? Because adults were writing her lines. But ALSO, her delivery nails it. And it’s not like it’s just a Thora Birch-in-Hocus Pocus situation, either: have you guys seen All I Want For Christmas? (If so, say something, and then I can write about it in December.) It’s Thora at her sassiest. So that being said, in the words of Practical Magic, there’s a little witch in every woman. But also, I like to think of Thora Birch as a kid who takes charge. 4. Also, children’s movies are the saddest movies And I say this because I want to talk about Binx, because Binx dying is still fresh in my mind. HE HAD TO SACRIFICE HIMSELF, YOU GUYS. For the kids! Do you know how SAD that is? This is a movie for CHILDREN. This movie and like, Homeward Bound (I will never write about that movie, so nobody ask because I will WEEP, and the whole piece will just be me crying) are proof that you can’t trust kids’ movies. Somebody always dies, somebody always says goodbye, and I, as an adult, have to pretend I am not being affected by any of it. Well guess what: I teared up just now thinking I might have a cavity, so surprise surprise, I AM. 5. “Dance yourselves to death” sounds like an LCD Soundsystem song And that’s probably because there’s an LCD Soundsystem song called, “Dance Yrself Clean,” but what I’m saying is that 1993 missed an opportunity to release a very relevant and addictive song attached to this movie. Also, though, what a horrible spell. Out of ANY “getting rid of people” spell, the Sandersons choose to dance people to death?! Get over it, ladies. It’s the nineties. If these people were going to pass away via dance, it would’ve happened on nightclub floors of the 80s. AM I RIGHT? [high fives self] But I mean, really. Just give them some potion or something. 6. Everyone identifies with a Sanderson sister And I’m not saying that’s RIGHT since I’m pretty sure they really go above and beyond the standard villain troupe (though I love them anyway because they’re complex and THAT’S how to write a villain, correct?), but ALL I AM SAYING is that I absolutely understand why Bette Midler is so obsessed with her spell book (who wouldn’t be?) but also with SJP’s sarcasm and . . . well, Kathy aka Mary and I don’t have much in common. But I admire her vacuum cleaner, and I’m not afraid to admit it. 7. Witch envy is fine, though And that’s something I tell myself because even though the Sanderson sisters are LEGITIMATELY terrifying, I still want to . . . be them? What’s going ON? Was it repeated viewings of Practical Magic and repeated readings of The Witches and an obsession with Practical Magic that’s continued to this day? Probably. Because here’s the thing: magic is cool, witches are cool, and powers are cool. They’re COOL. Why would you want to be one of the normal characters like Max when you can be a witch? Minus the children eating, obviously. But still. POWER. Because no one human should have it. (That’s why it’s being dispersed in this effective manor.) 8. Ernie and Jay should now have a post-Hocus Pocus movie In which we see them try to stifle the memories of their traumatic kidnapping while slowly accepting that magic was responsible. Of course, this would be WONDERFUL as they are now grown up and recognizing the error of their ways as kids. Maybe they’ve turned a corner. Maybe, somehow, they’re now involved in magic. Maybe they meet up with Thora Birch who rounds out some sort of great trifect. Maybe I’m just describing the movie we deserve to see. 9. But seriously though, those children would be traumatized after this How do you go back to school after that? “How was your Halloween?” – “Well, my kid sister was almost eaten/absorbed by evil witches and all of us almost died, including our parents.” – “Cool.” Right?! No! NOT TO MENTION these children didn’t even have any parents to confide in. “Mom, Dad, you almost danced to death.” – “Go to your room.” See? This movie is TERRIFYING. It is a psychological and emotional NIGHTMARE. And man alive I love it SO MUCH. 10. The nineties understood the importance of witches and it was wonderful Like, REALLY, though. Enter: this movie. Enter: Practical Magic. The Craft. Sabrina the Teenage Witch. Seriously! This decade ran with and embraced female empowerment via magic in a big, big way, and we’re all the better for it. Remember: witchcraft IRL is nothing like the children-eating mandate of the Sanderson sisters and their Hocus Pocus glory. But damn it, I’m still happy we had so many witches to choose from growing up. And I’m not just saying this because I’m listening to a playlist called “Witchy Thug Grrrl Pop” as I type this. You Have to See This Mean Girls/Hocus Pocus Mashup 17 Reasons “Hocus Pocus” Should Be A Broadway Musical #TBT – Hocus Pocus The 31 Days of HOMO-ween – Day 11: Bette Midler In “Hocus Pocus” (1993) – “Hello Salem, my name is Winifred! What’s yours?”

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