Gossip, But I Just Had To Laugh…

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Photo: Spark St. Jude

Mister D: Who knows if this is true…sounds more like one of the characters Bette would play or maybe our image of her on stage…but I thought it was funny, nonetheless…:-)

The Village Voice
by Michael Musto
March 30th, 2004 11:00 AM

The upcoming Stepford Wives remake has already been robotically deconstructed by the press, but I’m still as wound up as a mechanical housewife in my burning urge to see it, praying it’ll be mesmerizingly offbeat, not just downright bizarre. The cast alone is a Who’s Who of wait a minute, but in a potentially appealing, Oscar-winner-meet-country-star-on-the-way-to-Hollywood Squares sort of way.

Well, my on-the-set moles have finally stepped forward to categorize the wildly diverse thesps’ behavior during production. It seems that the always Stepford-y NICOLE KIDMAN was not horrible (though she wasn’t too chatty, seeing as she was in her “acting zone”); FAITH HILL was a total lovebug (and even brought that hunky hubby around); GLENN CLOSE made faces and was kinda fun; MATTHEW BRODERICK was rather remote (in fact, he exhibited “the personality of a rock”—maybe sensing Nicole didn’t want him there); CHRISTOPHER WALKEN was not happy (well, Gigli had just come out); and director FRANK OZ was such a doll that people feared he was a cyborg.

And BETTE MIDLER? She was the queen of kvetching and annoyed some observers, but in a way a lot of us can easily appreciate. When one scene’s filming dragged on too long for her, Bette reportedly approached co-star ROGER BART and moaned, “What the fuck are we still doing here?” “Collecting a paycheck, maybe,” the actor dryly responded. Another time, my sources say, Bette became fed up with being surrounded by so many tall, too-thin beauties. “I’d rather look like SHELLEY WINTERS than one of these anorexic freakshows,” she squawked. One of the gals heard that and, amazingly enough, started crying—but I’m totally with Bette. Put some poundage on, people! (And FYI, crying doesn’t lead to weight loss, OK?)

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