Syracuse Herald Journal
December 27, 1991
A few New Year’s resolutions Hollywood might consider
1 No more movies where the psychokiller has fallen and gets up three more times in the last 10 minutes of the movie.
2. No “Star Trek VII- The Gentol Years.”
3. No Milli Vanilli: The Reunion Tour.
Of course, these are only pipe dreams. But this is the season to clean up one’s act and while Hollywood may be too tough to tackle, itsÂ celebrities are no different from the rest of us.
Their New Year’s resolutions are resoundingly normal: lose weight, be nicer, get organized, do better in math.
Here, some 1992 resolutions of the stars.
BARRY MANILOW, singer: “I would like to work on the neatness thing Actually, I am too neat â€” disgustingly neat. You would want to slap me. Even my sock drawer is color-coordinated Maybe I will mix the blues and browns in 1992.”
MARLEE MATLIN, actrass: “I would like to work on my pet project, which is closed captionmg (for the hearing-impaired) in movie theaters Can you imagine? Deaf people could walk into any theater in the country. I also hope to find better and better acting roles.”
MACAULAY CULKIN, actor: “Well, I guess I could do better in English, although I really hate it I’m OK in math Science is not so bad. But English- Ugh'”
BETTE MIDLER, actress and singer: “I plan to get thin and gorgeous ”
JAMES BELUSHI, actor: “In 1992 I resolve to tell the truth There are too many people telling lies out there This is the year we should be less cynical Enough being a wise guy. Have faith, be happy, tell the truth.”
PAULA ZAHN, “CBS This Morning” anchor: “Maybe I should practice my cello a little more. I haven’t played in years and took it out to do ‘Late Night With David Letterman‘ I played with the band and I was a nervous wreck. Your cello teacher was right: Practice, practice, practice.”
OPRAH WINFREY, talk-show host: “This is the year of the child I am dedicating myself to help pass legislation that helps the victims of child abuse.
TOM SELLECK, acton “I hope to spend more time with my wife and daughter. I was on location for most of 1991, so a little time at home would be nice. I think my wife wants me to do stuff around the house I build wood benches for the wooded area on our property. It’s relaxing to just be out there in the woods. I hope to get out there more in 1992.”
AL PACINO, actor: “I make the same deal with myself every year: I just want to get back to that wonder I had as a child, that natural curiosity and pure joy in things. You get so bogged down in daily problems that you forget to be happy.”
JOHN CUSACK, actor “My resolution is definitely not to do more press. The mere thought of doing ‘The Arsenio Hall Show‘ is horrifying. Pretending like you’re having an intimate conversation in front of 20 million people â€” all that hugging and schmoozing is totally disgusting. “Will I conquer this in 1992? Probably not But I will root for the Chicago Bulls.”
JALEEL WHITE, actor on “Family Matters”: “1 want to convince people that I’m not a nerd in real life. I would like to make people more aware of bigotry.
CHRISTINA APPLEQATE, actress on “Married … With Children“: “Maybe Kelly Bundy will resolve to wear better clothes. Each week it gets worse. It is all pretty bad: tight skirts, short tops, very high heels. This girl needs a wardrobe resolution.
ROBERT ENQLUND, actor who plays Freddy Krueger in the “Nightmare On Elm Street”movies: “I did resolve to hang up the Freddygloves in 1991. Mission accomplished So now I’m resolving to be my own man. “I want to find a nice-guy role, although I have a (TV) series coming out soon called ‘Nightmare Cafe,’ which is like “The Twilight Zone’ meets ‘Cheers.’ The diner is sort of likeÂ purgatory. I’m not that nice of a guy.”
ANNA CHLUMSKY, actraa* in “My QkT: “I will do better in math. That is my resolution.”
JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME, acton “I will be the biggest martial-arts star in the world in 1992. This might sound like I am full of myseii, but I am a confident man. Men will love me; women will love me; kids already love me. To be the biggest, the best â€” that is my plan.”
BOZO THE CLOWN: “Maybe I will go wild, experiment with a new look, find a girlfriend clown. Of course, I should resolve to eat less cream pies. Cholesterol, you know. You never know what a new year will bring.