Bill’s Bette Benefit Bonanza – A First Hand Account Of The Spring Benefit

It all started in late March. I had received one of Don’s informative emails from Bootleg Betty. He announced the new spring picnic that The Divine One herself was hosting this year in NYC. I had always wanted to go to one of her charities, especially Hullaween, but I could never afford it. I am not exactly poor, but I don’t have a spare one thousand dollars to spend on a party, even if it is for charity. This yeah, however, the NYRP spring picnic tickets were cut in half to $250 for anyone under the age of forty (I turned 29 less than three weeks before the event). I felt that this price cut, which was due to our present economy, and the fact that I’d be living across the country soon, were both signs that it was my time to go.

I emailed Don and he really walked me through everything. I was perfectly blunt. I said I really didn’t care about anyone or anything else, but I just wanted to say hello to Bette and get my photo taken with her. That was my goal; my mission. I had briefly met Bette in 2005 on the day that her Peggy Lee tribute album hit stores. I stood in one of the worst rainstorms I can remember for hours outside of the now defunct Tower Records in Greenwich Village to get my wristband. Then I had to come back later in the evening and wait for hours again to meet Bette herself. When I finally got in, time did not permit photos to be taken, but Bette did personalize her new album cover for me. She even signed the t-shirt from her Kiss My Brass tour I was wearing. It is now framed and hanging on my bedroom wall.

At any rate, Don told me that the annual spring picnic was the best way of getting up close and personal with Bette. It is much smaller than her Halloween party and more casual. I really did not want to go alone to something like this. I asked a few friends and they could either not make it or could not afford it. I decided that it was now or never for me and went online to purchase my sole, lonely ticket.

As the weeks grew closer, the more nervous I got. Don really is an angel for putting up with me during this time. He was sweet enough to allow me permission to give his name to Bette as an icebreaker and since I will soon be working for an evening with Bruce Vilanch, to use his too. He also told Bette’s personal assistant that I’d be coming and to try to look for me. She told him she’d try, but could not make any promises. He suggested I not count on that and to find my own way of meeting Bette, to just kind of go with the flow. I should see what other people were doing, he said, and follow them,

The next chore, as May 19 grew nearer, was to pick which of my many Bette Midler t-shirts to wear to the event. I finally went with the one un-official one I have, which I bought in the parking lot outside one of the times I saw Kiss My Brass. The black shirt has the Rosemary Clooney album cover on the front and a list of tour dates, with an older picture of Bette, on the back. Yes, it is as divine as it sounds.

The night before, and on the morning of May 19, I could barely sleep. I did not want to have a dream about meeting Bette because I had so many times before and I am always disappointed when I wake up to discover it’s not true. I called a friend who I really wish could go, since she is a huge Bette fan too and I still wanted company! Then it was time to get ready to go to the train station. I took the train from Trenton, New Jersey to Penn Station in NYC. Almost the entire trip I listened to Bette on my iPod. I kept hearing her angelic voice, thinking that in just a few short hours I might be speaking to her! The train finally got into Penn and I took the A subway to 190th St, where Fort Tyron Park is located. A young woman named Alexis from NYRP was so sweet and gave me directions and any other help I had needed via email over the past few days prior to the event.

As soon as I got to the entrance of the park I took off my spring jacket and put my blazer on instead. The blazer fit the t-shirt perfectly, as Bette’s face peeked through the middle. As I was walking down the sidewalk, I could not help but to notice how absolutely gorgeous this park is. I had read that it was a ghetto when Bette found it and restored it over a decade ago, and I really could not picture it looking like that. As nervous as I was, I managed to snap a few photos of the flowers and the magnificent view from Washington Heights. I did get lost for a while, and finally found two policemen near where the entrance to Bette’s New Leaf Café is. They were skeptical jerks. They asked me what my name was (keep in mind they did not even have a list of names!) and I told them. They then asked me the name of the event and I told them that too. They then let me in.

As I approached the café I could see some people had already arrived. I gave my name to one of the women sitting at the table and she gave me a card saying I would be sitting at table forty-seven. They then told me to go in and enjoy a cocktail and some snacks. I took something that turned out to be a Triple Melon Martini. Take my advice, if you are ever offered one, take it! This thing was delicious and not filled with too much alcohol. After I checked my jacket in, I went out to the gorgeous back patio with the most beautiful view. I am basically walking in circles with the drink in my hand and noticing that I am about the only one by myself there! I am sure most of you know that feeling and it’s not good! I felt like the biggest loser of all time. I was all alone and surprisingly the only one wearing a Bette Midler t-shirt! I thought there would be a bunch of us.

I keep walking around for about fifteen minutes until I notice a guy there who looked familiar to me. It finally dawned on me that it was the same guy I sat next to on the subway. I went up to him and started chatting. His name was also Bill, and he was very nice. And even shorter than I am! I like that haha.

Bill kept eating many of the munchies being served and I kept refusing. I was too nervous to eat and most of it was fish, which I hate. Eventually, this older woman, who was also by herself, came to sit next to us. We all had a lovely chat. She was telling us that she goes to most of these charity events, including most of Bette’s. I asked her if she’d ever gotten to meet Bette before and she said she had and she was very nice.

As time went by, and the crowd got larger, and we all downed another triple martini or two, Bill noticed that Tony Bennett was out there mingling. We made a deal with each other; I would take photos of him with celebrities if he would do the same for me. I sometimes get nervous at these situations, and hate to impose. But I also figure this is my one shot of a photo with someone famous, so what the hell? Tony’s wife was a little nervous about us taking the picture, but Tony was fine with it. I didn’t get a chance to talk with him at all, but he was very nice.

Bill and the other lady (whose name I cannot remember) went to their tables once the tent in the back opened up. They were assigned to tables seven and eight and were all the way on the other side of the tent. I told them that I’d see them later.

I was the first to arrive to table forty-seven. I picked the seat I figured would afford me the best view of the stage and sat down. A few minutes later an older couple came and sat down next to me. I could tell I was going to fall in love with the wife right away. I learned her name was Flo and he was Brian. She was one of the most colorful and flamboyant people I had ever met. Ya know, the kind of person you’d hope to meet at a Bette Midler event. Eventually our table for ten filled up and I introduced myself to everyone else. We were a great bunch, if I do say so myself.

Comedian Judy Gold started the warm-up for the event and eventually Bette came on to speak. I honestly cannot remember much from this portion of the evening. My heart had recently sunken when I saw that there were more people there than I had expected. Probably three to four-hundred. I thought that this would dim my chances of meeting Bette and getting my picture taken with her.

Bette introduced the Tony-winning creator of the Broadway show In The Heights, which I saw last summer, and some local kids who did a mean game of Hula-hoop. This was all followed by the food, which came out very fast.

Corn bread, chicken, macaroni and cheese, and pulled pork were some of the yummy foods that were served. I did manage to eat a little, but not a lot. I was still too nervous about getting my photo taken with Bette, or even worse, not getting it taken!

I began talking to the man sitting next to me, Steve. He and his partner had been to lots of these events and he said he’d gotten his photo taken with Bette several times and that she was really nice. He offered to take a photo of me with her if I would do the same for him.

I had assumed that Bette would be eating with us. Instead, she was on the stage posing for photographs with people! This was my chance! I really started to feel butterflies inside, but it was now or never!

Steve and I waited patiently for the other people to get their photos taken with The Divine Miss M. I was no more than ten feet away from her by this time! Eventually, Steve wormed his way up to her and was saying something to her; I really don’t know what. I then took the photo of them, but his camera had shut off before I had gotten the chance and I didn’t know what to do! He turned it back on and I got the photo of them. I then went right up to her and thanked her for doing this and that was I friends with Don Bradshaw and Bruce Vilanch. She smiled when I said their names and we took the photo. I thanked her again and left with Steve while more people got their photos taken with her.

I wish I had said something more to her at that time, but I was so nervous! I really do think, however, that I was cool and aloof, at least on the outside!

I thanked Steve profusely and then finally ran with my camera to the restroom in the café! I had to pee for several hours at that time, but thought that doing so might cause me to miss my chance at meeting Bette! While in the bathroom, after doing my business, I took a peek at my digital camera. The photo actually turned out fabulous! I was so nervous that when I would finally get my picture taken with Bette I would look like shit, but I didn’t! And of course she looked more gorgeous than ever!

Once I left the bathroom I called a few friends and fellow Bette fans and excitedly told my story to them. I still could not believe it. I literally pinched myself (I am not kidding) to make sure I wasn’t dreaming all of this!

When I got back to the tent I found Bill at his table and he said he had gotten to meet Bette too. I was happy about that because I was feeling guilty for not waiting for him when I took my photo with her. Bill and I saw Martha Stewart posing for photos with people. I don’t know how she is in her personal life, or at work, but on this evening she was very charming and all smiles. I took a photo of her with Bill first, and then he took one of her with me. Again, a photo I actually liked!

I went back to my table and showed Flo my photos from my camera and she was very impressed. I ate a bit more, but unfortunately was unable to finish all the wonderful food. My adrenaline was still too high! I continued to talk with Flo and others at my table until Bette came back on stage to try to get more donations. She was asking for $2500 for a tree planted in your name. If I could have, I would have paid this, but it was not an option for me or anyone else at my table. We discovered that anyone who pledged was able to get their photo taken with Bette at their table. After the $2500 trees went, we received cards to fill out for $100 donations. I could barely afford that, especially on top of the $250 I had already spent, but since everyone else at my table did I figured “what the hell?”

The deal was that if every single person at a table donated money Bette would come and take a photo with them as well. A representative from NYRP was assigned to our table and kept trying to get Bette’s attention, but she was with the really big donators. Eventually she did come over to our table and announced us as donating $1000 between us. We were all set for the photo when Bette said she would be back soon, that she had to take photos with the really high donators first. We thought our chance was totally gone.

I cannot remember his name, but the man who started the donation at our table was really pressed on us getting a group shot with her. After the event ended, he waited to go up to Bette personally. He was not taking any chances even though Bette had promised and so did the NYRP guy assigned to our table. Once Bette saw him, he did not have to say a word. Bette told him she didn’t forget and would be over at his table in a few minutes as promised.

By this time only about half the table was left and we were all waiting patiently, with the guy who had just talked to Bette having his camera ready.

Bette indeed did come by, just as she promised. I had my blazer off by this time, fully showing the divine woman on my chest! We took one photo and Bette suggested we take another one! She then thanked each of us by shaking everyone’s hand. I was the last to go and as she shook my hand I asked her if she liked my t-shirt.

“I Do!” as she caressed the picture of her face on my t-shirt. Then she retorted with “But I wish I really looked that good!” and walked away laughing. That was a second divine moment I had not expected that evening!

The guy who took the photos took down my email address and that of the others and promised me personally he would send the photos to me the very next day. A voice in my head told me I should get his email address as well, but unfortunately I just ignored it and said that that would be fine.

As I was getting ready to leave people from NYRP handed me a very cute wicker basket that was donated from Target along with a book on gardening. I saw the man who had promised me the photos and the two ladies he was with, on my way out. They each hugged and kissed me and he again promised he would email me the photos the following day. Four weeks later, I have yet to receive them and have no idea as to how to get in touch with this gentleman. I only have a photo of the back of his head and part of his profile. He was with these two women and had told Bette he would soon be seeing her in Vegas. If I had to choose which photos to have, I would certainly choose the one I have, of just Bette and myself, but I paid $100 for this group photo and would love to have one!

I left the park on a high. Well, part of that high might have been from the smell of people smoking marijuana in the park when I took a wrong turn, but there was also a natural high! I eventually found the subway station and I rode back to Penn station with several other people who were carrying wicker baskets!

When we got into Penn I briefly talked to two nice guys, one whose name is Jude (he found me a few days later on Facebook!) and then went on my way back to Pennsylvania. I had to call about half a dozen friends, even if it was late. The moment I finally got home I uploaded the photos from my camera onto Facebook. I wanted to make sure nothing happened to my memory card before I got the photos on my computer!

I had a wonderful time and I would do it again in a heartbeat! I got to sing-a-long with Bette on three songs toward the end of the evening, and even hear Tony Bennett perform. I cannot thank Don enough for his words of encouragement and all the wonderful people I met that evening, including Bette in helping a dream of mine come true! Now if I could only get those other photos”¦

Thanks for reading fellow Betteheads!

Bill